I never thought my birth story would take me this long (a year) to share. But then again I look back on this year and it was a stressful year getting ready for another move with little ones. I took a break from blogging to focus on my family, my kids, and life, well knowing I would come back to the blogging scene with inspiring stories to share. :)
I had an emergency c-section with my son. In his birth story I write about all the complications I went through and how I struggled with the trauma of what I went through in the operating room. You can read all about it here
Sharing with you my birth story
Before I get into the actual birth story I want to mention that after going through an emergency c-section with my son, I was considering a VBAC (vaginal birth after c-section) for my second child whenever that time came. I did a lot of research on VBACs and even joined a Facebook group that had so much information. One thing I learned was that not all doctors performed VBACs. When I researched a doctor for my second pregnancy, whether they performed VBACs or not was not top priority for me. What was important was that the doctor was an overall amazing doctor with good bedside manner etc. I made sure I liked what I read in the reviews.
When I saw my doctor we did talk about birthing options and she asked me if I wanted to try for a VBAC and at that time I didn't know. As time went on and it was time to decide. I told my doctor I decided on a scheduled repeat c-section. I was at peace about it. Scared of course but I was at peace. I knew I had made the best decision for both of us.
On April 3, 2018 my sweet little princess Charlotte Grace was born. That day was a crisp morning with a beautiful overcast sky. I'm so thankful that my husband took that picture. I remember hardly getting any sleep the night before. I was nervous and anxious for my scheduled c-section at 5:30 am. But yet I managed to make some time for a little hair and makeup lol. Fleeky and slayed were not my mission, it was more like soft and effortless. ;)
In the car ride heading to the hospital my husband and I said a prayer asking God for everything to go smooth and for baby girl to be healthy with no complications. We checked into the hospital and we were told our room. Upon entering the labor and delivery floor I was greeted with a warm smile by a nurse. She led us to our room and told me to get into my hospital gown and get comfortable in bed and for my husband to get into scrubs to be in the operating room. I did have a cute hospital gown I had won on an instagram giveaway but I decided to wear it after surgery since I didn't want to get any blood on it.
I was welcome to a swan towel animal. And of course my hubby took advantage of every moment to take a picture and document the journey. It was fun and precious to see him so excited and I'm sure anxious.
In the picture above the nurses had put my IV in. My back was hurting and I had to lay on my side to be the slightest bit comfortable. I remember I was having sharp pains in my pelvis which I was concerned with. A few minutes later the anesthesiologist comes in the room introduces himself and explains the procedure. I can feel myself freezing and nervous but I trusted God and I kept covering myself in that precious blood of Jesus. A couple minutes pass by and my doctor comes in. Dr. Tse is the most sweetest doctor I have ever had. She sits next to me on that hospital bed and asks me how I am feeling, she explains to me a couple of things, and then she reassures me that I'm going to do great and let's have this baby!
Moments later I am being wheeled into the operating room to have my spinal. My husband was not allowed back into the OR during this procedure. The operating room was cold and stark white. The operating lights were intimidating along with other machines and tools that were surrounded. I remember shaking from being scared, nervous, and cold. Thankfully I had the most awesome anesthesiologist. He was gentle and explained everything thoroughly step by step. While they were inserting my spinal, my doctor was there along with other nurses calming me down with positive words and holding my shoulders.
I can't remember every detail but I do remember sometime after that my husband came back to the OR. It might have been sometime before or after my husband came in, the doctor tested to see if I was numb. The doctor had poked me with a tool on my stomach to make sure the anesthesia had taken effect. This part was important to me because of what happened with my first. But I felt nothing.
While I was under the surgical light I could see a reflection of what was going on. I could see medical tools such as a scalpel and so on. I refused to look in that direction. There was no need to watch something that would only make me more scared.
Surgery started at 7am that day. As I lay there the anesthesiologist told me step by step what I would be feeling. I couldn't hold my husbands hand. They had my hands strapped down and they had put some heavy blankets over me or a covering of some sort. I can not remember.
Minutes into the surgery I hear my doctor saying, "I'm making room, I'm making room." A couple more minutes pass by and I hear the most beautiful cry. Charlotte Grace was born at 7:21 am. I immediately start crying. My baby girl is born! She is here. They showed her to me over the curtain and I just thought of how beautiful and perfect she was with that full head of black hair.
They immediately took her to get cleaned and weighed. Daddy went along to be with our baby girl. I could hear him talking to our daughter and welcoming her into the world. Surgery was continuing on for me. But then finally daddy brought over baby girl to my side. And how sweet of our anesthesiologist to take such awesome pictures of us.
It was such a joyous time. I loved every minute with this sweet girl. I couldn't believe everything had gone so smooth. Especially compared to my first. I did not feel a thing. Not one tug nor one pull.
I was taken back to my room where I was bonding with baby girl and waiting for my in-laws to bring big brother over to meet his sweet baby sister.
A big brother gift was awaiting him. After all he was promoted to big brother. In it was some goodies to play with and have fun.
Manny loved seeing his baby sister Charlotte and just seeing my whole family together was a beautiful moment. I felt so incredibly blessed. I was so thankful to God.
I remember feeling very tired through out my hospital stay. Every time baby would fall asleep there would be someone coming in to take vitals and things of that sort. They were doing their job and I was appreciative of all the nurses and staff. Ever since having a baby I have the upmost respect for Nurses. I had some of the sweetest caring nurses I could ask for. If you are a nurse thank you so much for all you do.
The following morning my doctor came in and told me it was a good choice we decided to do a repeat c-section. She said my uterus was thin and could have ruptured if we would have tried for a vbac and it could have been very dangerous for both baby and I. Wow, talk about God's goodness and grace. I am so thankful God gave me the wisdom to chose a repeat c-section and for Him to give me the peace about it as well.
While I was bonding with baby I asked my nurses how soon I could start walking. They said within 6 hours from the surgery. I could not wait. I was determined to get up to walk and recover. It was hard and getting up was the hardest part. I felt so sore and in a lot of pain but it got better. I took baby steps and took it slow. I did a lot of pep talking to myself lol ( I can do this, I can do this). I made my laps around the labor and delivery floor while wearing my super cute maternity hospital gown I had won from an instagram giveaway.
I had wanted to do everything so differently from my first c-section. I had learned from it and I wanted to make this experience a better one and it was.
I was prepared with cute beanies for Charlotte. I was in pure bliss with all that pink. It has always been my dream to have a little girl.
This was our last day at the hospital. For our last meal there they prepared my husband and I a delicious steak, mash potatoes, vegetable medley with salad and strawberry cheesecake for dessert. It was amazing.
I was so swollen the days after. I had such a hard time finding what to wear that complimented my figure. The swelling was a little depressing but I got up, I dressed up, and I didn't give up. Not saying that I got glam ready each day but I did make an effort to do something nice to myself. Whether it was doing my hair a different way, applying a fresh makeup application. Because no matter how small it was I felt good about myself. Overcoming that stage of postpartum was really hard but I chugged. I had my bad days and I had my good days.
As new moms we don't have much time for anything. But the littlest things can make such a huge difference in the way we feel. I gave myself grace. I had just given birth and my body would find it's grove back to where it used to be. The postpartum weight loss journey will have to be for another blog post but for the record I'm still not back to pre baby weight and that's ok. :)
The swelling lasted almost 3 weeks until everything went down. I almost thought I would never go back to normal lol. But I did and it was great.
Surprisingly I recovered much faster with my repeat c-section than I did with my emergency c-section and that is mainly because my body went through so much more in the emergency c-section. I felt good within a couple days and I felt so much better at about a week yet still a little bit sore. I was so surprised at how fast I was recovering. A couple weeks went by and I felt great. By 4 weeks I felt fully recovered. I kept a positive mind and I stayed active as much as I could.
My little angel turns one tomorrow. This year has flown by. She is so fun, extremely smart. She blows me away. Charlie loves music and loves to dance and she loves when I sing to her. She's such a girl. I'm excited to watch her grow and experience it all.
Everyone's birth story is different and special. And every mother should be so proud of their journey and their story because it is not easy no matter how you gave birth. We are fortunate and blessed to be mothers. And I love my c section scar. It is the one that saved my child's life and mine.
Marilu
And this is why I create a life I love. I chose joy and love over and over! I forgive.
